Okay, I believe in God, though I have wandered from his path I know he is still guiding me. I believe I he has always guided me even as a little girl.
I remember once about 5-6 years old I was lying down in the sun, my mom was outside tending to the flower bed, and I heard the most BEAUTIFUL voice calling to me... it was a sexless voice... And I can’t even describe how Beautiful it was... crystal... singing... and all it spoke was my name, calling my name. I of course got up and went to my mom... asking her what she needed, she looked at me funny said she never called me. I returned to my sunny window bed and lay down. 2 more times this voice called to me, pretty as the first time, right in my ear yet far away... each time I got up and went to my mom. After the last time and certainly curious as to who was calling me and not finding the source I stayed up and didn’t return to laying down. Through out the years I thought about it and just said that was my Angel let me know I was being watched.
I have always believed in Ghosts, and Demons and such... to the point of acknowledging them but not the point of letting my self really see them. I think if I let myself truly believe I would see them and a whole different world would open to me. I am not ready for that.
Over time I have seen things that make me wonder. Children playing, then they disappear( that happened when I was growing up, these kids came onto our porch and every time I ran outside to say hi or stop them... they were gone... just gone.... a boy of 12 years, a little girl 7-8 and a boy about 3 or 4.) Mostly though, I feel things. Don’t like that side of the house, or just get cold, TV's turn on or I cant wake up and I feel someone sitting next to me, and actual impression on the bed, blankets being moved. I just pray... and they go away. I have a friend who has a daughter (16 when I met her) and one day I am at this house and we were all sitting around the table, and the host says " I have ghosts", I look at her and tell her, " don’t talk about things like that, I have and empty house to go home to" than this 16 year old girl turns to the host (who she had never met till then) and says " ya, you have a Calvary soldier in your back yard. He keeps coming and looking in at us. His name is -----, he has been back and forth all night." Her mom says she has been doing this sense she was 3 years old, and never discouraged her but never thought about it either. -They have there own stories to tell- I started crying. The only thing I could think of was this girl had been in my home. And I at the time lived in an OLD home, very old home. There was parts of my house I didn’t like and if i could, stayed away from, the backyard, the back room(which I think was added on later, and my son slept and had nightmares in for one year) and my living room bay windows. I got the courage to tell her one day, "I know what I feel in my home, tell me what you see, and we will see if they match up" she told me there was a man that walked from my back yard and along the sides of house like he is looking for something that is lost. From the bay windows, down the side around my backyard and to the back side of my son’s room - I think whatever he was looking for was in the room of my son, his presents was more there than anywhere- I have been told that I could see if I wanted to, they haunt my dreams at times, my almost asleep phase, late at night... But I am not ready. Don’t know if I ever will be. If you accept any of it you get the bad with the good. I know there is more bad then good. I don’t need to expose my family to it.
_________________ Jenn There is something we can learn everyday.
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